The Village Elder

This is a great sermon on "Aging." Rob Bell delivers this message with such practicality. What he is weaving into the fabric of his congregation through this message needs to be heard by many. Check it out. "The Village Elder" by Rob Bell

At the appropriate place, pause the message and click here to watch the video they saw in church - Johnny Cash - "Hurt"

Movies to Watch with Annie...

For several months now I have been meaning to make a list of movies Annie and I can watch together on those rainy days in our future. We probably won't have a TV, or atleast cable, so I figured I'd make an evolving list of movies we should watch sometime. We have already knocked one off the list up here in Alaska on a rainy day--Hitch. It was a movie I had seen, but Annie hadn't. We both gave it a classic two thumbs up. So, without further adieu, may the list evolve...

• Breakfast at Tiffany's
• Star Wars (All of them)
• Spaceballs
• Braveheart
• Nacho Libre (we didn't make it through it last time...)
• Grizzly Man
• Gone with the Wind
• Sleepless in Seattle
• Airplane
• What the Bleep Do We Know

Grace and Peace

Grace and Peace (Philippians 1:1-2)

charis not chairein. Grace to you not the typical greetings to you

Grace = Joy, pleasure, gratification, favor, acceptance. A favor done without expectation of return. Every kind of good to you. We have been given a gift with no expectation of return.

Grace and peace to you. We need it. We need people to speak it to us, we need to speak it to others.

Paul is intentional to take a standard greko-roman letter greeting and turn it into a peculiar spin of the Gospel. Gordon Fee said this, “Here is a marvelous example of Paul’s ‘turning into gospel’ everything he sets his hands to.” “Very likely there is significance to this order: the grace of God and Christ what is given to God’s people; peace is what results from such a gift. Hence, “grace to you--and peace.”

Ireighnae (Peace) = wholeness or well-being

When Grace and peace are present we live in the bounty of God’s love--in the Spirit.

Gal. 5 Fruit of the Spirit love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. every use in scripture but one means peace to you TODAY. Only once is it used in the future tense.

What if we started every conversation with “Grace and Peace.” What if before all precepts and differences, we were in the mindset of “grace and peace.” What if we were so rooted in grace and peace that we could forgive people who have driven nails into our hands and feet? Grace and peace helps us ask, “Do I wish upon this person, or even myself, joy? Pleasure? Gratification? Favor? Acceptance?”

Can I speak grace and peace? Can expect it from you? What would it look like if a whole community of people practiced grace and peace -- All the hurt, all the shame, all the things we’ve done in the past that we are not proud of, all of our enemies, and all the people who get under our skin. What if before we slandered and gossiped, we lived grace and peace.

In Between Songs

While riding with my parents to Lincoln for Amelia’s birthday, I realized I wasn’t sure if I could relate more with the (horizontal) song, “Fix You” by Coldplay or rely more on this (vertical) song by Kim Walker...

There is no love sweeter than the love you pour on me

There is no song sweeter than the song you sing to me

There is no place that I would rather be

Than here at your feet laying down everything

All to You, I surrender

Everything, every part of me

All to You I surrender all of my dreams, all of me

If worship is like perfume I’ll pour mine out on you

For there is none as deserving of my love like you

So take my hand and draw me into you

I want to be swept away lost in love for you

All to you, I surrender

Everything every part of me

All to you I surrender all of my dreams all of me

All to you, I surrender everything every part of me

All to you, I surrender all of my dreams all of me

I surrender...cause I trust you God

I surrender...cause my hope is you

I surrender...I place all my trust...

I surrender to you God cause your ways are far above mine

No turning back, I’ve made up my mind

I’m giving all of my life this time.

Your love makes it worth it, your love makes it worth it all...

What does it mean for me to trust God with area’s of my life that have no tangibles? Such as relationships. This is what I currently find myself asking. Just coming out of one relationship and trying to move on with healing. Wondering about how long it will take for me to be emotionally healthy or if I am there now?

It seems, in romantic relationships, there is not a tangible process I can enter into to help me move out of one relationship and into another. The only step I can think of would be labeled, “time.” It just takes time to move out of one and on with another. Everyday I feel the longing for this relationship in my life and yet I feel like God has me in a holding place. I’m not far enough removed from my last relationship but don’t know if spending time with another interest is a healthy or foolish decision.

What does surrender in this area look like?

There are so many areas in life that we have no tangible steps to take to just “fix” our problem. I find myself objectifying and rationalizing love--both the love that I receive and the love that I give, and the love that I long for. It’s so hard to trust God and just wait for the person who I will be with for the rest of my life. I have to be ok with not having answers. I have to be ok with being too cautious, and at the same time I have to be ok with taking risks. Do I step out and get to know another person while keeping proper and balanced boundaries to protect each of our hearts? Is it even possible to get to know someone without becoming too attached?...or is that the point?

If I just act on how I feel God is moving me, that would change by the day, if not by the hour. Sometimes I feel really confident that I can wisely take a step in one direction, while the next day I am super insecure about my choices and I just want to revert back to what is comfortable and what I know (maybe that old relationship?).

So I ask, what does it mean to trust or surrender to God?

A Place in the Sun

I stepped away from home for a few days this winter and made a quick flight to Phoenix to visit some friends and spend a day with Jaclyn. When I bought the airline tickets I was not sure how my heart would respond to being back in the dessert after the kind of fall I had in Nebraska. My heart has been longing to be back in PHX for the spring because I love Arizona in March. No better city to live in for the month of March with the smell of orange blossoms in the air, spring training baseball, ultimate frisbee, cool (not hot) pools, and 80 degree temperatures around the clock. No better place in March. I had to go, but I almost didn't. Now, I am glad I did.

The weekend began as every other weekend on Friday evening when I flew in. My friend Brad picked me up and we drove to the REI garage sale where we met Tyler and camped on the sidewalk for the evening. We had a great time and met some cool people. Saturday morning after the garage sale, I met Emily and Herb for lunch downtown. We ate at the Farmer's Market and found a great new coffee shop. I began my Sunday lent celebration a day early and had a small, double, two raw sugar breve. Yumm! Then, after saying goodbye to Herb, Em dropped me off at Brad's place and Tyler joined us in a great conversation about altruism and what the gospel of Jesus really is and can be. We asked many question. I'm not sure we found answers to all the questions we raised but we definitely found solutions. It all usually boils down to a four letter word--love. And that's what those two are doing in with their neighborhood on the west side of the city. I was able to see first hand what was going on with their neighborhood as I helped bring ladders and paint back to storage from a mural they were working on. Kids with mohawks and (gasp) tattoos and piercings working together to paint the gospel on the side of a building.

Let me explain the mural. It begins on the left with a golden road coming out of the mountains, passing the Statue of Liberty and then intertwining with the buildings of PHX. Some of these buildings morph into books with the bottom book labeled "knowledge." There is a pad lock and chain around the city, implicating the city is locked up. On the golden road, back to the left now, are hundreds of people, immigrants walking towards the city from the mountains. Approaching the city near the road stands a church building with many people outside of it waving their arms for the immigrants to come join them inside the church. What it means to me is that the church has it's arms open to all people. The church knows no walls or boundaries...or atleast it's not supposed to. We are called by Jesus to love all people regardless.

Before riding the lightrail from downtown to Mesa to meet Jaclyn, I went to a culture group leaders meeting with Brad. I thought I'd be able to see some old Poiema friends. I had a few nice conversations and even talked with pastor John's wife, Deborah, for a bit. It was good to catch up with those friends that I hadn't seen for so long. Once Jaclyn picked me up, we went out for Sushi at RA. Another Yumm...Spicy Tuna!

On Sunday morning Jaclyn and I ran a 5k. We ran 7/8 of it together and then she left me at the end, but I caught her in the last 100 yards (how far behind I was too) and she beat me by just one second. I ran it in 29:31. We each finished first in our 5 year age group! ...4 in Jac's and one other person in mine. Yeah, I'm that good!

After the race we grabbed breakfast with Emily. She made us a wonderful Egg, Turkey, Spinach, Tomato, Mango, Craisan, and "Bobba-Ganush" hummus omelet wrap. Then we went back to Vern and Melinda's and sat in the community pool hot-tub on a rainy cold afternoon. I bought some grapefruit (8 for $1), and some jalapeno jelly at the Ranch Market. Later that evening Jac and I went to my old Starbucks and had coffee and the best conversation. Just talking about life, love and the details in between. I love that I can do that with her and Julia now. One day, Jared will be there too...not to mention the nephews and nieces.

In the end, it was a much need trip back to the desert to heal and reconnect. I did just that. And I was able to encourage others along the way and make some new friends.

Alltruism

Altruism - Is this a god of mine?

altruism : unselfish regard for or devotion to the welfare of others

-Merriam-Webster Dictionary

Over the past 4 years my understanding of the Gospel has changed dramatically. In a very practical way, I have grown to understand the words of Jesus to be much more about others and how he came to save the world and not just me. I've come to understand the Gospel is less and less about me being right and having a corner on the truth and more and more about how I treat those around me. How I love the mere notion that I love because I was loved first, and that I can and should love others just because God loves them...and that I love others just because. This is a difficult world view. There are so many people out there who I have difficulty loving, and I have so far to go. Once we are able to love all people we will be very close to Glory, if indeed that is not Glory itself.

In my feeble attempt to try to love all people, just because, I have found that part of my motivation for loving others is selfish. I love them because I want them to love me. I'm a people pleaser. In some ways, I think we would all struggle with this, especially if we have that people pleasing gene (ppg). So, getting around this is one thing. I often wonder how much I have become driven by the "gospel" or little g "god" of altruism. This would be the large piece of the Gospel of Jesus that is more about others than it is about Jesus. See, I have always understood the heart of God to be about His glory.

My introspection is this, "Does God receive glory when I love others for the sake of others, just for the sake of doing good? Aren't most people out there all for doing good to one another? Is there a difference between me who tries to help others in Jesus name (and sometimes my own) and those who just do it for the sake of Good in the world--altruism? Can altruism be an idol? In a culture where celebrities are seen more and more creating a trend of altruism, do i fall down to a trendy idol? How do Christ followers lead the culture in loving others just because it's what we are called to? AND, how does it look different--or will it?

I know that in order to love others so they see the love of Christ in me, I don't have to give them a tract or hit them with a Bible verse but my faith will be seen at some time in the future if, in fact, there is relationship. You could say there will be a peculiarity in my personality. Like 1 Peter 2:9-10 says,

"But you are the [peculiar] ones chosen by God, chosen for the high calling of priestly work, chosen to be a holy people, God's instruments to do his work and speak out for him, to tell others of the night-and-day difference he made for you—from nothing to something, from rejected to accepted."

I think it is great that Angelina is adopting (pray for those kids!). I think it's great that Starbucks gave away free coffee last spring for doing volunteer work in your neighborhood. I think its great that so many commercials on tv have celebrities promoting rescue in Haiti, peace in Afganistan, love at home, hope for the poor, and a green planet. All the while, this is the message of Christ and I have to do my part to lead like these celebrities...even though it won't be the popular, accepted thing to do. Is Jesus big enough to make his Glory known even when people do good in the name of altruism?

A time to mourn?

Why does the church celebrate lent? I will be exploring this question and writing more about it when I have an internet connection and electrical connection. For now, I will have to work on it when I get home. I'm sitting in my Tacoma in the parking lot of Paradise tonight so I can use their wireless to atleast write this much. Watch for more tomorrow. To be continued....

The Puttings Off

Well, with limited battery life, I will atleast post what I plan to put off. So far, I have decided I would fast from coffee, sugar, and yeast (bread & beer). Probably 3 of the most consumed foods that make it into my body (minus the beer). I'm still workin though the probability and possibility of chemicals and preservatives. I know I can avoid them to a point, but in Scottsbluff, it is much more difficult to find these "whole" foods than in a larger city. That's the plan. So far so good! ;)

Today was my second day at the Y. And my second blog. Reflecting is hard for me. I type, I delete, I type, I rephrase...

Romans 8 and suffering is on my mind tonight after the Ash Wed. service at Plymouth. My thoughts were different than the message I heard. I sat and asked myself, "Why do we always ask, 'Why?' when suffering occurs? It's like we feel that we don't deserve suffering. Are we, as people, really so great as to ask why we deserve suffering? I don't think my self confidence is too high or too low, but I make decisions everyday that impact people somehow. Unless we were all perfect, suffering would cease to exist. Alas, we are not perfect. Suffering comes but joy comes in the morning. "after the birthpains" Paul says.

FAT Tuesday

Tonight I celebrated all the freedom I think that I have--I bought a blondie and a couple margaritas from Applebees. Why? Just because I can’t, or wont, after tomorrow. Tomorrow begins Ash Wednesday. An important time in the church the calendar. Probably a time that should not be looked forward to. My own attitude heading into Lent, 2010, is one of anticipation. Anticipation because something great is going to happen. After doing the Daniel Fast last year on only “whole” foods, I know this year will be hard. It’s going to be hard not for what I am putting off (stay tuned to find out what that is...and I will too!) but what I will try to put on. Discipline will be the key word. Actually, lets call it self-discipline. In putting off certain pieces of my day-to-day life that cost me (cravings, time, money...), I also want to put on other pieces of what I would like to call a more holistic lifestyle. I want to reflect more. I want to push my body physically in a routine like I haven’t ever done. I want to do these to help me see Christ some how. So I ask, How do I see Christ in blogging or working out? I believe I will see him through the people and experiences this trial brings me to. If you are reading this, its because you know the I need your help. It’s a little community in my transient time in Scottsbluff. Funny though, how self-discipline involves others--or maybe peculiar. So, here we go. Lend me your ears, your eyes, your thoughts. It should be hard. I’m not looking forward to it...but I am. And on Ash Wednesday, may I do something that would help me remember the pain, suffering, and sacrifice that Christ laid down on His path to the cross for us so I may attempt to do it for others in order that they see Him.